Canarsie

Well, now that we have gotten business out of the way, please allow me to show you around the Lounge...

Over there is where you will find the latest publications to read, as we have literally hundreds of them, including out-of-print books provided by obscure2k from her private collection. If you would rather watch some entertainment, we have a stage with some of the biggest names in show business, ready to perform just for you — LIVE! Ask and they will perform for you, whether it is comedy, music or drama. If you prefer the pre-recorded variety of entertainment, that entire wall over there is a state-of-the-art television screen, stocked with every television show, concert and movie from the last 90 years, all at your disposal.

If you look this way, you will find our complimentary food and beverages, available 24 hours per day, every day. We spared no expense: you will find truffles (both the mushroom and the chocolate varieties), Lobster Thermidor, Beef Wellington, Beluga caviar, shrimp cocktail, filet mignon, fresh-baked assorted breads and pastries, petit fours and other fine desserts, and other examples of some of the finest foods in the world on your left, most cooked to order exclusively for you by our team of executive chefs. On your right, you will find an endless selection of beverages, including the world’s finest wines, beers, cocktails, mixed drinks of every kind and soft drinks of every kind, as well as hot beverages of assorted coffees, teas and chocolates. Everything is available free of charge and you may consume as much as you like, but we regret to inform you that food and drinks cannot be taken out of this lounge, nor are there any exceptions to this rule. Still, none of us understand why nobody has yet to eat the food and drink the beverages...

We were going to spare no expense and install state-of-the-art computers in the Lounge, but since everyone that enters the Lounge is already using a computer, so we decided to save the money.

Over there, to your right through that doorway, you will find the most exclusive shower and lavatory facilities, with the softest linens, scented dripless candles, fragrant anti-bacterial soaps, a tanning facility, multiple shower heads with voice-activated customized temperature controls, and other amenities. They are always cleaned, and an exclusive personal attendant is provided to everyone who uses these facilities.

We appreciate your patronage in the Delta Forum Lounge. We look forward to seeing you stop by, as often as you like!