GoodKarmaGuy

Ahhh... Palm Springs!

THE FIFTH ANNUAL PALM SPRINGS FLYERTALK GAYLA!
APRIL 4-6, 2008!

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LIGHTS COME UP. SLOWLY. SWEETLY. CUE MUSIC.

Desperate FLYERTALK Housewives - Episode 01.01 - Pilot

An Ensemble Cast

Overview of a nice, upscale neighborhood. Birds are chirping, people are basking in the sunlight, sitting on park benches, checking their mileage balances and calling the 1K line trying for that last-minute upgrade. This is HYSTERIA LANE.

Focus on a house where a man scurries around inside, carrying various luggage. The camera zooms in through a window. The man’s voice is the one in the voiceover:

"My name is GoodKarmaGuy. When you read this morning's Community Forum, you may come across an article about the unusual day I had last week. Normally, there is never anything newsworthy about my life. Especially since I stopped flying and traveling for work. But that all changed last Thursday."

As he talks, we see snippets of what he's describing.

"Of course, everything seemed quite normal at first. I made breakfast. I performed my chores. I completed my projects. I ran my errands. In truth, I spent the day as I spent every other day, quietly polishing the routine of my life. Until it gleamed with perfection. That's why it was so astonishing when I decided to go to my hallway closet and retrieve a United Coupon that had never been used."

Mary Alice holds the gun to her head and pulls the trigger. The gun goes off and in the reflection of a mirror, Mary Alice falls to the floor.

We hear the man’s voiceover again:

Errrrrr... wrong script... ummmm... let’s see, Desperate FlyerTalkers... Desperate FlyerTalkers.. Ahhh...here:

GoodKarmaGuy holds the coupon to the light and gasps. “EXPIRED!” The coupon falls to the floor in slow motion and in the reflection of a mirror, GoodKarmaGuy falls to the floor with a cry.


A woman reaches down into a pile of red, blood-like liquid, dips her finger into it, and raises it to her lips to taste it, then turns to look out her window when she hears the cry. The voiceover continues.:

"My body was discovered by my neighbor, See Ya, who had been startled by a strange cry and moaning sound. Her curiosity aroused, See Ya tried to think of a reason for dropping in on me unannounced."

See Ya goes to her hallway closet and removes a blender that has a label on it reading "Property of GoodKarmaGuy."

She leaves her house and hurries over next door.

"After some initial hesitation, she decided to return the blender she borrowed six months before. "After all", See Ya muses, "GoodKarmaGuy might switch from Martinis this year to Frozen Daiquiris at the Palm Springs Gayla!"

See Ya goes to the front door and rings the bell, waits, then rings it again. She then goes around the house and peeks through a window. Seeing GoodKarmaGuy on the floor, she screams and rushes back to her house to call FlyBalletGuy..

"It's GoodKarmaGuy! I think he’s dead.. There's luggage everywhere! And I glimpsed a coupon on the floor. Yes, you've got to send someone. You've got to send Viajero Joven right now!"

She hangs up. Cut to a NYC theater foyer with a bewildered FlyBalletGuy looking at his cell phone.



"And for a moment, See Ya stood motionless in her kitchen, grief-stricken by this senseless tragedy. But only for a moment."

See Ya turns to look at the blender with its label firmly attached.

"And if there's one thing See Ya was known for..."

See Ya tears off the label on the blender.

"...it was her ability to look on the bright side."

She puts the blender back in her new Tumi bag, the one with rollers. After all, IluvParis has been promising a return to the Gayla and HE knows how to make those damn frozen drinks.

Many people go to GoodKarmaGuy's house, dressed solemnly.

"I was severely dressed down on Monday. After the talking to, about EXPIRED COUPONS, all the residents of HYSTERIA Lane came to pay their respects. And as people do in these situations, they brought food. missydarlin brought fried chicken."

missydarlin rings GoodKarmaGuy's front doorbell, caring a large platter of chicken, looking happy to see her old friends.

"Missy had a great family recipe for fried chicken. Of course, she didn't cook much while she was climbing up the corporate ladder. Besides, she was preoccupied with her kids in Hawaii. I mean she was WITH her kids in Hawaii, she didn’t leave them in Hawaii and then become preoccupied with.... oh, never mind."

Flashback to missydarlin in a boardroom, giving a fried chicken to a group of people. Then flash forward to the present time, missydarlin walking down the sidewalk, holding the chicken platter and pushing a stroller. As she walks, her other eight children, all little boys, two of whom are twins, walk in front of the stroller, the twins pushing each other as they walk.

"But missydarlin's life had become so hectic, she was now forced to get her fried chicken from a fast food restaurant. One would have appreciated the irony if one stopped to think about it."

“The great irony, too, is that like kids and like the ever arguing twins, FlyerTalkers are engaged in a tussle of the wills at the Palm Springs Gayla V. Yes, I mean the Sunday Brunch Gift Swap."

peteropny has had enough of holtju2's XXX rated videos: "Listen to me. You are going to behave today. I will not going to be humiliated in front of the entire Flyertalk community. And, just so you know how serious I am..." [peteropny pulls a piece of paper out of his jacket].

The twins, StSebastian and bluesincenew, ask in unison,"What's that?"

peteropny: "Santa's cell phone number."
lisamcgu: "How'd you get that?"
peteropny: "I know someone who knows danhammer53 who knows an elf. And if any of you acts up, so help me, I will call Santa and tell him you want coach seating for Christmas. Are you willing to risk that?"

All the FlyerTalkers shake their heads no.

He straightens up. "All right, let's get this over with. START THE SWAP!"

The camera pans to a man in a sleeveless muscle shirt, standing outside of a beautiful house. He turns to watch his gorgeous husband hurry down the steps to meet him.

We hear the voice over:

"olafman, who lives down the block, brought a spicy paella and a set of pecs to my house. Paella always cheers me up"

Flashback to when olafman was younger, walking down the runway as a fashion model.

"Since his modeling days in WeHo, olafman had developed a taste for fun food and fun men."

Flashback to a restaurant, where olafman and bigguyinpasadena are having dinner.

"Bigguypasadena, who worked in mergers and acquisitions, was setting up a car pool to The Palm Springs gayla. Organizing is his strong suit.. olafman was touched when tears welled up in his eyes. But he soon discovered that this happened every time bigguyinpasadena organized something."


The door to the GoodKarmaGuy’s's house opens to show a well-groomed young man standing outside. He's holding two baskets full of baked goods.

"fooko2002, who lives next door, brought baskets of muffins he baked from scratch. fooko2002 was known for his cooking, and for taking off his clothes, and for having many, many drag queen friends. Even Tommy Hilfiger was rumored to be a friend. And he’s not a drag queen. They say. Yes, fooko2002's many talents were known throughout the neighborhood. And everyone on HYSTERIA Lane thought of fooko2002 as the perfect party guest. Everyone, that is, except the other handsome young boys."

fooko2002 walks in, with Wireless following, hardly looking up from his iPhone.

Wireless is carrying a silver tray of Grey Goose martinis with aluminum foil covering them. The foil comes off the glasses and he has to grab it before it flies away. Noone even notices nroscoe sneaking a martini off the tray.

"Wireless, who lives across the street, was forever being teased by FlyerTalkers, saying it was the only thing he knew how to cook, but he did make them well.

While friends gather ‘round GoodKarmaGuy consoling him on the loss of his coupon, there are various flashback to treasured memories of old Gaylas in Palm Springs: The unknown woman passed out on the River Rocks at the Villas; Mom, Larry, Good KarmaGuy , StSebastian and bluesincenew going up the tram; Norma getting lost for an hour at Beer Bust in the Barracks; jockdaddy’s hosting at The Red Tomato, now a tradition gone to the wayside; pool side massages; missydarlin in a sarong(!); suitless swims at the Villas; topless swims at the villas(!); drag queens; strippers; great venues and not-so-great venues.

In present time, peteropny interrupts GoodKarmaGuy’'s memories, saying that the jacuzzi needs fixing, as he can't face doing it himself. KenCT agrees. GoodKarmaGuy asks if he's okay. KenCt tells him, "Just fix the jacuzzi, buster."

But GoodKarmaGuy knows that KentCt is just a big softy.


This is, after all, FlyerTalk life on HYSTERIA Lane.

~ The End ~




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BTW, Which Housewife are YOU??"
NOTE: If you put "male" the darn website won't tell which housewife you are. It will tell you which housewife you should MARRY! (yikes!)

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To see what all the fuss is about, view the first post and perhaps the last page or two of posts
for these past Palm Springs Gaylas:

Palm Springs Gayla IV, 2007 (The “reviews” start on page 8 or so I think.)

Palm Springs Gayla III, 2006 and some more reviews of Palm Springs Gayla III.

Palm Springs Gayla II, 2005 and, if I do say so myself, a very good thread of reviews!

And lastly, Palm Springs Gayla I, 2004, (which, at the time, we didn’t know was #1!). And the reviews are here.

Whew.

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SCHEDULE:

Thursday Night: Early bird arrivals usually meet for dinner and drinks and then go to the FREE Thursday Night Street Festival in Palm Springs. 7pmish.

Palm Springs World Famous Annual Friday Night Martini Party 830pm: This year DesertDave and his very cute bf, Keith, have offered to host the event poolside at their Palm Springs manse.
The Martini Party is a pay-in-advance event. Paypal or mail-a-check details will be posted below by peteropny, the Gayla's official treasurer. The cost is a very reasonable $10 for one alcoholic drink or less and a very reasonable $20 for all-u-can-drink! We will have premium vodka martinis. 4 or 5 kinds. And hors d'ouvres.

Feb 12 Update!:FABULOUS, FUN, FIERCE, FANTASTIC NEWS! DesertDave and his bf, Keith, our Martini Party hosts for this year, are providing a stetch limo for all of the Martini Party guests! This is their GIFT to the Gayla. Isn't that the most amazing thing!!?

ALL GUESTS MUST PARK AT THE DESERT MOON. There is plenty of safe, easy, street parking out front of the DM if you are not a registered guest. The parking in the Dave and Keith's neighborhood is extremely limited and, more importantly, the police patrols are notoriously beefed up for Dinah Shore Weekend. Since the Martini Party starts at 830pm, the first limo will leave the DM at 815pm. The last return car will leave Dave and Keith's at 1145pm for the DM where we will be providing an after-party firepit wind-down. And of course Toucan's is next door. We will have late transpo from Dave and Keith's as well so not to worry. The limo will be out front of either Dave's house or the DM ALL EVENING. (So, when someone forgets their pocketbook, they can run back and get it. Not that they will need it. )

Saturday Day:
-Usually a desert hike in the morning organized by FlyBalletGuy 11ish
-shopping at the Cabazon Outlets organized by peteropny 11ish
-all day scheduled poolside massages organized by your Gayla hosts
-day-long poolside mileage tip sharing

Saturday Dinner
Drinks at 630pm: Poolside at the Desert Moon Resort.
Dinner and a Show at 8-ishPoolside at the Desert Moon Resort.
Dinner and drinks are all included at $40pp. This includes taxes and grats. Like the Martini Party, Dinner is a pay-in-advance event. Again, Paypal or mail-a-check details will be posted below by peteropny, the Gayla's official treasurer.

The menu (VEGANS TO PM ME!):
Green Salad with Italian Herbs, Tomatoes and Onions
Vegetarian Chili
Freshly Baked Sourdough Bread
Oven-Roasted Potatoes and Veggies
BBQ Chicken
Cook-Your-Own-Steaks
Dessert: S'mores

Beverages:
Non-Alcoholic: Soft Drinks and Ice Tea.
Alcoholic: Sangria and Tecate Beer and a domestic lite beer. (We have to use cans, no bottles, hence the brands)

Steaks are "cook your own" which will be very fun and conversational.

Entertainment is a surprise. Trust us, it will be the best yet. But bring some singles.

Saturday Night Gay Bar Hopping Organized by we-don't-know-who-yet; str8 contingent organized, this year, by we-don't-know-who-yet; and NOT chaperoned by Wireless or fooko2002 .

Sunday Brunch1130am-ish:
Site TBD. This a pay on your own event. This year we are at Azul. They have a nice casual menu and a $9-three-trip Bloody Mary bar. Our fab brunch will include the World Famous Palm Springs Gayla Gift Swap. This is a bizarre, very fun blind gift swap. Years' past the gifts have been beautiful, cheap, hairy (who can forget the CHP FTer receiving a nicely boxed...errr.. "cigarette"... ), raunchy (one of our dear ones produces XXX videos) and classy ($40 in a nice organic Jamaican wallet! <<waving to Lisa>>). We are hoping for classy and raunchy this year.

Sunday Tea 7pmish:
The gay version of course, which means Sunday Tea DANCE. This has been Beer Bust at the Barracks in the past but will be evening drinks and 10pm drag show. Entertainment provided by fooko2002 (if you tip him). This is one of those comments that gets us in trouble with the FT TalkBoard. Also, a few of us will probably start out at the Barracks at 6pm.


There is a similar thread over in the Community Forum. Please remeber to post on it sometimes so all of FT will know that WE are all inclusive.

Note: Please do not assume that because someone appears on the "Who is coming list" they are str8 or gay. All are welcome. But we are more than happy to leave your name OFF the list and still have you attend! This has worked well for folks in the past.

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Who is coming:

DEFINITES:

DesertDave +1
peteropny +1
olafman
JCinNYC +1+ his fag hag, Kristen
Wireless
nroscoe
fooko2002
StSebastian
bluesincenew
FlyBalletGuy
aviation kiwi +1
KenCT
Tennen
GoodKarmaGuy + who knows
aluminum tubing
SJC1K
World_Traveler
umguy
Foady
ILuvParis
jockdAAddy
SeaMeFly
ebayj
DFWSkylink
howard-socal
PHLbuddy
stratofortress
Barr1965 +1
dfwoods
izzik +1
a330Marcus
JonathanIT
chtiet
LAX Gambit
holtju2 +1
rapp81
DesertMoonDavid + 1
wxguy


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The host hotel is the Desert Moon Resort which has a GREAT LOCATION for us. For booking info go to www.desertmoonresort.com. MAKE SURE TO VIEW THE CANCELLATION POLICY. We are a "special event" so we are a 30-day cancellation requirement. Details and prices are in the second post of this thread.

NOTE: AS OF MARCH 9 THERE ARE ROOMS LEFT AT THE DESERT MOON, SOME MAY BE SUITES.

SEE POSTS #83 and 86 FOR "SHOULD I STAY AT THE DESERT MOON?" COMMENTS.

Oh and look for a "Missy" award. In honor of Her Fabness not being able to attend this year. ( )

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TIP: Payment for dinner and the Martini Party will be through PayPal or you can mail a check. See the second post for directions on how to pay. IF YOU ARE LAST MINUTE OR UNSURE, PM ME. WE ALWAYS CAN WORK SOMETHING OUT.

TIP: Don't forget, we often organize side things like shopping and hiking.

TIP: See the end of this post for Palm Springs general info.

TIP: Reserve a rental car now. You can cancel later. The prices will go up, up up!

GOODKARMAGUY'S SPECIAL TIP: I always book car rentals and then recheck once a week to see if the rates have gone down. PSP cheapest rental car: Dollar Rental Car. REMEMBER: Airport car desks close early!

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Some cool gay PSP links (with notes!) by gay :

http://ww.palmspringslife.com/medi...vents/index.php

Here is a link to things happening at the PSP convention center and events:

http://www.palmspringscc.com/events/default.aspx

Here is a link to a gay rag the Desert Daily Guide, which is posted on the net:

http://www.desertdailyguide.com/weekly/index2.php

Here is a link to another gay rag the Bottom Line, which also is posted on the net. It has a nice list of events each month (check early March for March events):

http://www.psbottomline.com/

Here's a site about gay PSP. It's mostly advertising but does have a map.

http://www.palmspringsgay.com/

Here's a great site about PSP, which includes a gay section:

http://palmsprings.com/

AIRPORTS

Local airport: PSP. This airport is really, really cute and worth flying into if it is not a lot more money. And no, you will not need a car if you are only there a couple days. Hotels have free parking and there are some awesome daytrips.NOTE that the car rental desks here close early: 9/10pm!

Alternative Airports: LAX, SAN (2-3 hour drive depending on traffic), SNA, BUR, ONT( @ 2hour drives +- depending on traffic), LAS (cheeeeeap rental cars but a 4 hour, albeit gorgeous, drive).

Some creative routing may be beneficial. For example, 2 years ago AS for $108 SFO-PSP was found. While that may not work for the Gayla(who knows, though!) it does seem that a low fare to SFO, ONT, LAX or LAS may be combined with a low fare to PSP.

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SIDETRIPS: Many available! Also several special events that cannot be had elsewhere:

If you can get in on Thurs nite - Palm Springs has a street fair downtown- they close down the main street to traffic and there are booths up and down the street . I had the most marvelous roasted corn - yum makes me want to come back. - jan_az

The Palm Spring Follies are supposed to be fabulous. The ladies are all retired show girls, some from Broadway, others from Radio City Music Hall, and so on. I've see a video and they are terrific. The run is usually from November through May 30. Thanks to SanDiego1K


Joshua Tree National Park is a few miles away and is a beautiful drive with hiking and walking available. If you are nice to him, KenCT might go on a jeep tour with you.

There is a big Casino and Spa in downtown PSP.

Palm Springs even has an Air Museum!

This will be a very fun weekend... Don’t Miss It and SEE YOU THERE!

GoodKarmaGuy

NOTE: AS NOTED ABOVE, AS OF MARCH 9, THERE ARE ROOMS LEFT AT THE DESERT MOON, SOME MAY BE SUITES.


The Palm Spring Gayla's official treasurer is our own peteropny. Here is the info on how to pay for these very fun events:


REMEMBER that we have great rates and a shoulder rates at the Desert Moon Resort. A fab, small gay resort with upgraded breakfast, excellent location, free wi-fi, off street parking, and this hotel will be almost exclusively ours. A few rooms are 2 bedded and there is one suite which should probably go to mwp2paris and The Divine Miss N.

IMPORTANT INFO FROM THE HOTEL OWNERS: :

<<<<<The weekend of the PSP Gayla is one of the busiest weekends of the year as it is also the weekend of Dinah Shore. This definitely impacts the rates we are able to offer, but we are still offering them at a discount to our normal event rates of $159-189 per night. That being said, here's the skinny:

1) We have a three night minimum stay beginning at a rate of $139 per night. Additional nights are offered at a special rate of $89 per night. Please note that there are a few premium rooms available (one suite and a few mini-suites) that are slightly higher in price. All rates are based on double occupancy. Additional people (beyond two) are $20 per person per night.

2) We are very pet friendly, you can bring your canine or feline companions and the pet charge is $20 per pet per stay (NOT per night).

3) We charge one night room and tax upon booking as a deposit, which of course is credited to your stay.

4) We will honor this rate for any FT'er until the time we are sold out, or two weeks prior, whichever comes first. In order to book this rate, please provide your FT forums "handle" when making your reservation. We *will* sell out, and are very excited to have you all back this year.

5) The cancellation policy: for special events and group weekends (this actually qualifies both as both) we normally have a zero cancellation policy. But as a special accomodation to GKG and the group, we will allow cancellations up to 30 days prior to arrival. For cancellations prior to 30 days, there will be a $25 administrative charge. Any cancellations requested after this period are refundable only if the room is resold. The administrative charge will be $75 if the room is resold, but you will not have any responsibility for the balance of your stay. >>>>>>

peteropny

EEEK!!! GKG - you're not coming??????

Aluminum tubing

I'm in & Wireless & fooko2002 are great chaperones

"Hold the orange juice in my MIMOSA"

GoodKarmaGuy

**sigh**

That would be funny if we didn't all know that you really say "EEEK!" sometimes.



p.s. Montana, darling, of course you are in. Sorry. I know I am missing some others but my ritalin is wearing off.

itsaboutthejourney

who will play the Jesse Metcalfe/John Rowland a.k.a. shirtless hottie gardner role?

SJC1K

I'm in.

Will the Desert Moon guys ever get their act together regarding reservations? I've called a few times to try to book that weekend, and they keep giving me future dates when they will start to accept reservations for it. The last time I called they said to call back after 12/1. I don't think I've ever called a place of lodging that was less eager to take my reservation. I'm still planning to stay there for the convenience of the place for the event, but I'm blown away by their lack of eagerness.

olafman

GKG -

Fun opening story! I'm still trying to get over the "when olafman was younger" comment. You must be speaking of my teenage years!

We just booked a week at Walt Disney World and I had a brief moment of panic when I thought it was the same time as the PSP Gayla. But thank goodness, it's a couple of days AFTER Palm Springs.

I love that this year, the weekend is a bit later so hopefully we'll have hot stunning weather encouraging LOTS of barely suited bodies by the pool.

I am VERY sad to hear that missydarling and The Girls will not be joining. We'll miss you. BUT... you're Girls can be replaced.

So a nationwide search has begun for a lovely pair of bosoms for our event. I will set up a website where we can vote on the winning pair. The Girls have a long history with the PSP Gayla and my goal is to ensure their continued participation.

So hopefully the WGA continues to strike so that we will get further installments of Desperate Flyertalk Housewives.

I just hope they don't find out the abortion I had when I was twelve (before the gender reassignment in South Africa).

Stay tuned...

GoodKarmaGuy

Well honey, I meant younger as somewhere in there..... Hahahahaha...

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Who knew that you could find scripts of entire TV series online! I had TOO MUCH FUN reading them all and trying to pick which one to steal from. There were none from this season with the guy-couple. That would have been too easy anyway.

I will be offline for a few days now as I'm goin' to the farm.

The Desert Moon asked that we book beginning after Dec 1st as the owner is out of town. Sorry I didn't pass that on. I recieved a very nice communique' from them and they are very happy to have us back.

olafman

To kind of quote Norma Desma, "I'm still young, it's the calendar that got old."

FlyBalletGuy

Great story, GKG! Why do I always get cast in Thelma Ritter's roles and never in Bette Davis'?

Next time, I want to at least be Celeste Holm. I will accept being Anne Baxter, if and only if George Sanders, impeccably dressed as always, throws me on the bed, barely dislodging the cigarette from his holder and says in a clipped, sardonic tone, "You know you belong to me completely, don't you?"

And I will sigh! I will WEEP! "Yes Addison." I will sob, my bosom heaving. . .

Sorry. What were we talking about?

I've already got my plane tickets, so I'm definite for this shindig!

fooko2002

Awesome...checking the volleyball schedule now...
I'm excited to return to CK for some underwear shopping. They are still my favorite!

BTW - Gay Volleyball Nationals in Miami over Memorial Day weekend. Great trip to tie into Gay Days if any of y'all are interested...

Wireless

:makes mental note to drop fooko off in a particular store in the Castro at SF Gayla:

Oh, and I'm tentatively planning on Gay Days in Orlando the weekend after Labor Day.

bigguyinpasadena

I learned long ago that references such as these dated me-and yet I still persist
You do realize that no one under,,,ummmm "30" ^,,,,wil get this right.
These kids with their Hippiddy Hoppiddy music and "stars"that cannot even do a Lost Weekend without it getting into the tabloids,they do not know what they are losing out on!

bigguyinpasadena

Or to Rio to get involved in a vollyball game on the gay beach!