How to Deal with Wildly Inappropriate JetBlue flight attendant?
#1
Original Poster
Join Date: Mar 2019
Programs: BAEC Gold
Posts: 10
How to Deal with Wildly Inappropriate JetBlue flight attendant?
TLDR: I had a very shocking experience on a JetBlue flight yesterday and am wondering how to best approach it. I don't really want any compensation, but think the airline should be aware of how this flight attendant is behaving. Fully story below:
I boarded my jet blue flight yesterday and tried to use the restroom before take off. A flight attendant told me the flush doesn't work before takeoff, and I said okay and returned to my seat. Another flight attendant came over a second later and beckoned me back to use the bathroom. When I went back up, the first flight attendant stood in front of the bathroom, blocked my way and said - "Explain to me why you need to use the bathroom right now I'm curious, after a three hour delay why could you possibly need to use the bathroom??" He repeated the question two to three times and I finally said I was on my period. He looked disgusted and said I "didn't need to say all that." I agreed I shouldn't have needed to say that, but felt forced to discuss this private matter because I was repeatedly asked the question while he was blocking my way to the bathroom.
Later in the flight I went up to use the bathroom again and saw the same flight attendant there. When I saw him, I felt compelled to tell him how inappropriate I felt his questioning was. He immediately became hostile. Sensing I wasn't going to get anywhere discussing it with him, I very politely asked his name so that I could follow up with Jet Blue customer service and de-escalate the situation. He immediately became more hostile and said he wasn't telling me his name, he wasn't telling me ..... I repeated that I just wanted to know his first name, and he threw his hands up and started yelling, "your harassing me!", "your harassing me!" over and over. I think he yelled it at least five times. At this point I got spooked and went inside the bathroom. When I came out, a female flight attendant was there and started asking me why I was harassing her flight attendant. Hoping that she would be more sympathetic and help him understand why that line of questioning and his reaction were so inappropriate, I started telling her the entire story. When I got to the period part, she looked disgusted and said, "TMI, you really didn't need to say that to him. Didn't you think that would make him uncomfortable?" I was shocked and now felt humiliated for a second time during the flight for a bodily function that 50% of the population has (and that I didn't want to discuss in the first place). At this point, she threatened to report me to the captain for harassing her flight attendant. Not wanting to cause a scene, I went back to my seat feeling humiliated and confused (I've flown thousands of miles and never had a problem before, much less have someone threaten to call the captain mid-flight).
The female flight attendant did tell me the male flight attendant's name, but I later discovered that she gave a fake name. After the flight, I went to speak to the gate agent about the experience. She seemed extremely concerned and asked me what the flight attendant's name was. She seemed shocked and said I was given a fake name, and told me the flight attendant's real name after I described him. I'm outraged that I was not only subjected to this experience, but also given a fake name to ensure I couldn't report it afterwards.
I've still been thinking about this the next day, and decided I don't want any compensation for the flight. I genuinely feel like this is an issue the airline should work on addressing. Does anyone have advice on how I can go about getting some sort of acknowledgement from Jet Blue / other suggestions.
I boarded my jet blue flight yesterday and tried to use the restroom before take off. A flight attendant told me the flush doesn't work before takeoff, and I said okay and returned to my seat. Another flight attendant came over a second later and beckoned me back to use the bathroom. When I went back up, the first flight attendant stood in front of the bathroom, blocked my way and said - "Explain to me why you need to use the bathroom right now I'm curious, after a three hour delay why could you possibly need to use the bathroom??" He repeated the question two to three times and I finally said I was on my period. He looked disgusted and said I "didn't need to say all that." I agreed I shouldn't have needed to say that, but felt forced to discuss this private matter because I was repeatedly asked the question while he was blocking my way to the bathroom.
Later in the flight I went up to use the bathroom again and saw the same flight attendant there. When I saw him, I felt compelled to tell him how inappropriate I felt his questioning was. He immediately became hostile. Sensing I wasn't going to get anywhere discussing it with him, I very politely asked his name so that I could follow up with Jet Blue customer service and de-escalate the situation. He immediately became more hostile and said he wasn't telling me his name, he wasn't telling me ..... I repeated that I just wanted to know his first name, and he threw his hands up and started yelling, "your harassing me!", "your harassing me!" over and over. I think he yelled it at least five times. At this point I got spooked and went inside the bathroom. When I came out, a female flight attendant was there and started asking me why I was harassing her flight attendant. Hoping that she would be more sympathetic and help him understand why that line of questioning and his reaction were so inappropriate, I started telling her the entire story. When I got to the period part, she looked disgusted and said, "TMI, you really didn't need to say that to him. Didn't you think that would make him uncomfortable?" I was shocked and now felt humiliated for a second time during the flight for a bodily function that 50% of the population has (and that I didn't want to discuss in the first place). At this point, she threatened to report me to the captain for harassing her flight attendant. Not wanting to cause a scene, I went back to my seat feeling humiliated and confused (I've flown thousands of miles and never had a problem before, much less have someone threaten to call the captain mid-flight).
The female flight attendant did tell me the male flight attendant's name, but I later discovered that she gave a fake name. After the flight, I went to speak to the gate agent about the experience. She seemed extremely concerned and asked me what the flight attendant's name was. She seemed shocked and said I was given a fake name, and told me the flight attendant's real name after I described him. I'm outraged that I was not only subjected to this experience, but also given a fake name to ensure I couldn't report it afterwards.
I've still been thinking about this the next day, and decided I don't want any compensation for the flight. I genuinely feel like this is an issue the airline should work on addressing. Does anyone have advice on how I can go about getting some sort of acknowledgement from Jet Blue / other suggestions.
#2
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Soprano Land / North Jersey
Programs: MSC Diamond, NCL Platinum Plus, RCCL Platinum, IHG Platinum Elite
Posts: 205
That's horrible. I would go on their twitter page and post my experience. You will get a quick response. Do it so something like this doesn't happen to anyone else.
#3
FlyerTalk Evangelist
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: NYC
Programs: AS MVPG, DL KM, Bee Six, Bonvoy Plat, Choice Plat, Avis PC, Natl Exec, Greyhound Road Rewards OBM
Posts: 17,523
Twitter is the way to go -- since it's public, you'll get the fastest response. Try to keep it a little more concise.
But I agree this is absolutely unacceptable.
-J.
But I agree this is absolutely unacceptable.
-J.
#4
Join Date: Sep 2017
Programs: Delta Platinum Medallion, Hyatt Explorist, Wyndham Diamond
Posts: 322
TLDR: I had a very shocking experience on a JetBlue flight yesterday and am wondering how to best approach it. I don't really want any compensation, but think the airline should be aware of how this flight attendant is behaving. Fully story below:
I boarded my jet blue flight yesterday and tried to use the restroom before take off. A flight attendant told me the flush doesn't work before takeoff, and I said okay and returned to my seat. Another flight attendant came over a second later and beckoned me back to use the bathroom. When I went back up, the first flight attendant stood in front of the bathroom, blocked my way and said - "Explain to me why you need to use the bathroom right now I'm curious, after a three hour delay why could you possibly need to use the bathroom??" He repeated the question two to three times and I finally said I was on my period. He looked disgusted and said I "didn't need to say all that." I agreed I shouldn't have needed to say that, but felt forced to discuss this private matter because I was repeatedly asked the question while he was blocking my way to the bathroom.
Later in the flight I went up to use the bathroom again and saw the same flight attendant there. When I saw him, I felt compelled to tell him how inappropriate I felt his questioning was. He immediately became hostile. Sensing I wasn't going to get anywhere discussing it with him, I very politely asked his name so that I could follow up with Jet Blue customer service and de-escalate the situation. He immediately became more hostile and said he wasn't telling me his name, he wasn't telling me ..... I repeated that I just wanted to know his first name, and he threw his hands up and started yelling, "your harassing me!", "your harassing me!" over and over. I think he yelled it at least five times. At this point I got spooked and went inside the bathroom. When I came out, a female flight attendant was there and started asking me why I was harassing her flight attendant. Hoping that she would be more sympathetic and help him understand why that line of questioning and his reaction were so inappropriate, I started telling her the entire story. When I got to the period part, she looked disgusted and said, "TMI, you really didn't need to say that to him. Didn't you think that would make him uncomfortable?" I was shocked and now felt humiliated for a second time during the flight for a bodily function that 50% of the population has (and that I didn't want to discuss in the first place). At this point, she threatened to report me to the captain for harassing her flight attendant. Not wanting to cause a scene, I went back to my seat feeling humiliated and confused (I've flown thousands of miles and never had a problem before, much less have someone threaten to call the captain mid-flight).
The female flight attendant did tell me the male flight attendant's name, but I later discovered that she gave a fake name. After the flight, I went to speak to the gate agent about the experience. She seemed extremely concerned and asked me what the flight attendant's name was. She seemed shocked and said I was given a fake name, and told me the flight attendant's real name after I described him. I'm outraged that I was not only subjected to this experience, but also given a fake name to ensure I couldn't report it afterwards.
I've still been thinking about this the next day, and decided I don't want any compensation for the flight. I genuinely feel like this is an issue the airline should work on addressing. Does anyone have advice on how I can go about getting some sort of acknowledgement from Jet Blue / other suggestions.
I boarded my jet blue flight yesterday and tried to use the restroom before take off. A flight attendant told me the flush doesn't work before takeoff, and I said okay and returned to my seat. Another flight attendant came over a second later and beckoned me back to use the bathroom. When I went back up, the first flight attendant stood in front of the bathroom, blocked my way and said - "Explain to me why you need to use the bathroom right now I'm curious, after a three hour delay why could you possibly need to use the bathroom??" He repeated the question two to three times and I finally said I was on my period. He looked disgusted and said I "didn't need to say all that." I agreed I shouldn't have needed to say that, but felt forced to discuss this private matter because I was repeatedly asked the question while he was blocking my way to the bathroom.
Later in the flight I went up to use the bathroom again and saw the same flight attendant there. When I saw him, I felt compelled to tell him how inappropriate I felt his questioning was. He immediately became hostile. Sensing I wasn't going to get anywhere discussing it with him, I very politely asked his name so that I could follow up with Jet Blue customer service and de-escalate the situation. He immediately became more hostile and said he wasn't telling me his name, he wasn't telling me ..... I repeated that I just wanted to know his first name, and he threw his hands up and started yelling, "your harassing me!", "your harassing me!" over and over. I think he yelled it at least five times. At this point I got spooked and went inside the bathroom. When I came out, a female flight attendant was there and started asking me why I was harassing her flight attendant. Hoping that she would be more sympathetic and help him understand why that line of questioning and his reaction were so inappropriate, I started telling her the entire story. When I got to the period part, she looked disgusted and said, "TMI, you really didn't need to say that to him. Didn't you think that would make him uncomfortable?" I was shocked and now felt humiliated for a second time during the flight for a bodily function that 50% of the population has (and that I didn't want to discuss in the first place). At this point, she threatened to report me to the captain for harassing her flight attendant. Not wanting to cause a scene, I went back to my seat feeling humiliated and confused (I've flown thousands of miles and never had a problem before, much less have someone threaten to call the captain mid-flight).
The female flight attendant did tell me the male flight attendant's name, but I later discovered that she gave a fake name. After the flight, I went to speak to the gate agent about the experience. She seemed extremely concerned and asked me what the flight attendant's name was. She seemed shocked and said I was given a fake name, and told me the flight attendant's real name after I described him. I'm outraged that I was not only subjected to this experience, but also given a fake name to ensure I couldn't report it afterwards.
I've still been thinking about this the next day, and decided I don't want any compensation for the flight. I genuinely feel like this is an issue the airline should work on addressing. Does anyone have advice on how I can go about getting some sort of acknowledgement from Jet Blue / other suggestions.
OP, I sent you a pm. Hopefully it'll help.
#5
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 784
It's truly horrible that (1) the flight attendant harassed you, and (2) anyone said unkind things because you were on your period. I would definitely share the story both on Twitter and on social media, to ensure that nobody ever has to endure the humiliation that you've experienced.
At the risk of going off topic, I also think it's horrible that food stamps can't be used for tampons. I'm a middle aged man, and I often buy tampons for food drives, because food shelves need tampons more badly than they need food. Although many people look at me very strangely when they see me buying several boxes of tampons. it's something I'm glad to do so women can get the protection and dignity that they need.
At the risk of going off topic, I also think it's horrible that food stamps can't be used for tampons. I'm a middle aged man, and I often buy tampons for food drives, because food shelves need tampons more badly than they need food. Although many people look at me very strangely when they see me buying several boxes of tampons. it's something I'm glad to do so women can get the protection and dignity that they need.
#6
Join Date: Dec 2012
Programs: AA Plat Pro
Posts: 972
De-escalation starts without making the above statement. Once past that point, please refer to the 30 Rock episode where Liz Lemon's boyfriend is a pilot and the crew lead, Stuart(?) and Liz interact. I bet its similar.
Last edited by NewbieRunner; Feb 23, 2023 at 3:53 am Reason: Please use quote function
#7
Join Date: Dec 2018
Location: Somewhere between BHX and HUY
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Posts: 1,844
Agree that once you ask for someone's name you need to assume the conflict will go nuclear.
In this case as you had flight number + description, it would have been enough to identify the bully.
And yes, his attitude was 200% unaccaptable.
-Asking for someone to justify use of toilet? Bully.
-Showing disgust at mention of periods? Prude bully.
The smaller the power, the more it is abused.
In this case as you had flight number + description, it would have been enough to identify the bully.
And yes, his attitude was 200% unaccaptable.
-Asking for someone to justify use of toilet? Bully.
-Showing disgust at mention of periods? Prude bully.
The smaller the power, the more it is abused.
#8
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Atlanta Metro
Programs: DL Gold, AC, BA, Hhonors Gold, IH Platinum, Bonvoy Gold, Hyatt Discoverist
Posts: 2,478
What business is it of his why you need the restroom? That's what started the whole mess, and it's just insane.
Yeah, report all of this.
Yeah, report all of this.
#9
At the risk of going off topic, I also think it's horrible that food stamps can't be used for tampons. I'm a middle aged man, and I often buy tampons for food drives, because food shelves need tampons more badly than they need food. Although many people look at me very strangely when they see me buying several boxes of tampons. it's something I'm glad to do so women can get the protection and dignity that they need.
Thank you. I do the same and it is so important. Tampons/Pads also shouldn't be taxed - why are women's health products subject to sales tax?